Didn’t find what you needed in the “Dumbest Car Items in Auto Parts Stores” list? Still looking for something unbelievably tacky to waste your money on? Fortunately, the internet and global trade have made it easier than ever to wade through acres of cheap junk. Let’s get started.
Many people wish they had a soft cover for their hard and scratchy rearview mirrors. Okay, I made that up, but you do have to wonder why this item exists. Do their mirrors get hot to the touch? Are they adjusting the mirror every few seconds and chaffing is a concern? Is the car so filled with Hello Kitty stuff that there is nothing left to accessorize? Just get a tattoo then. Or light your $15 on fire. Either way.
Not content to just buy a cheesy steering wheel cover, the buyer of this kit gets a whopping 21 pieces of garish nonsense with which to decorate the interior of their poor car. In addition to the head pillows and seat belt pads, you also get handbrake and shifter covers, so in an emergency, you can screw up a critical shift. The 1800s grandma design is just bonus.
Fashion kits: when you have to lower your car’s value as quickly as possible.
Superchargers force more air into the engine, where it makes more power. The one problem? They cost a few thousand dollars and aren’t available for every car. Enter the electric supercharger, a device that could work in theory, but not for $90 and some PVC. As the ad states: “It is your best choice for motorcycle updated.” I’m sold! What the buyer doesn’t know is that this junk will likely cause a reduction in power. Oh and new off-brand turbochargers go for a little over $100 on eBay. Save your cash and do it right.
Everyone’s favorite redneck accessory, Truck Nutz are a plastic or metal scrotum-ish looking lump that… well, I’m not sure what it’s supposed to do. Add gender to a unisex vehicle? Nutz usually attach to a trailer hitch, and some are stationary while others swing freely as if in boxers. Anyway, if you desire, they come in a variety of colors, or chrome, and can even be anatomically correct. This is by far the grossest and dumbest way to spend $25 on your ride.
Why is this a thing? I get the bobble heads and hula girls, as they move or dance to the vehicles movements. This figurine set doesn’t move, has nothing to do with anything automotive, but is meant to be displayed on the dash. This might say something about the driver, but I’d be afraid to guess what it means. Is she looking for his truck nutz in there?
A weather station totally makes sense for the home. By the time you are in your vehicle, you probably know if it’s hot out, or raining, or whatever. This “high-tech” piece looks like something Doc Brown would put in his DeLorean, and informs you of all the info that every car made in the last 20 years already provides. It’s cheaper to look out the windows.
If one cigarette lighter isn’t getting it done for you, how much are you smoking? And if you buy this device, I’ll have to ask what you’re smoking.
Alright, so your Fiat 500 is cute. It comes that way from the factory, and you don’t need to up the cuteness. Adding eyelashes certainly won’t do it, as it just makes the car - and the driver – look nuts. What’s next, lipstick around the grille?
Very Important People tend to drive, or be driven in, exceptionally high-end vehicles. Slapping a badge on your 26 year old Accord does not make it the equivalent of a new Rolls. In this case, VIP stands for Very Inferior Plastic.
Tire lights started as just valve stem caps lit by a single bulb. The plague has spread, and now there are programmable displays that can put on a lightshow on your wheels as you drive. Because you need other drivers around you distracted. The latest trend is these solar powered center caps, so you can be eco-friendly as you look utterly stupid.
That’s the list, in no particular order, as I couldn’t stand to look at this stuff anymore. Please post up if you have found something worse, as I believe the 10 dumbest car items on eBay could easily swell to double this size.
By Andy Jensen – Contributor
Didn’t find what you needed in the “Dumbest Car Items in Auto Parts Stores” list? Still looking for something unbelievably tacky to waste your money on? Fortunately, the internet and global trade have made it easier than ever to wade through acres of cheap junk. Let’s get started.
